Welcome to College, Jewish Population: Small
My sister found out tonight that she got into her early decision college choice, which means that she is going to George Washington University after her year-long stint in Israel. She was so excited and I'm excited for her.
Except that I did everything in my power to convince her not to go to GW.
My sister is one of the strongest people I know. She is strong in her beliefs, in her knowledge, in her actions. She knows herself and is self-assured in a way I often envy. And I think she can grow and prosper wherever she is. Really I do.
And yet, she's going to a college with a very, very small frum community. And that makes me very, very nervous. (Which is not to say that Columbia's huge frum community is all fun and games and good stuff.) But I think there's something to be said about going to a school where frum people are accepted, where there are multiple minyanim and kosher food is readily available.
But then again, she's a big girl. She knows who she is and what she wants from life. She's old enough to make her own decisions--and she doesn't listen to me anyway. It's time to let go and let her make her own destiny. (Is this what being a parent feels like? I'm too young for this.) I'll just have to sit and watch from the sidelines.
posted by Eli7 @ 8:44 PM
7 comments
7 Comments:
I'm not sure if I should say congratulations or say oy.
She should go to university in Israel. There's, like, a gigantic "frum" community here.
Sheva - I actually disagree with your assessment. I find tons of kids from frum high schools go off to the colleges with large frum populations and are promptly led off the derech. At small schools though, I've seen just the opposite.
My theory - At the big schools, you can take your religion for granted. The davening and kosher are taken care of for you. And there are tons of "frum" kids all doing the things they shouldn't be, so it's easy to follow. But when the frum kid goes to the small school, he/she becomes the leader. They become the expert, and assume important leadership roles, which teach them to value their frumkeit.
Good luck to your sis!
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Josh -
I have sadly seen the exact opposite. Commuting to a school with a very small ortho community, I witnessed year and year out how every freshman class would have a handful of frum Jews, and by the end, maybe one or two would still be frum. They didn't stop being frim because everyone else did. All of their friends practically weren't frum, the Hillel director was some new-wave female Rabbi who thinks she's Ortho, and the little things..like not being able to get into any building on Shabbos just became irksome to the point that they started swiping despite ostensibly keeping Shabbos.
Anyway, Eli7 - would lil sis travel to Balto for Shabbos? Does she have friends in College Park?
GW? Not too many Jews there and the local community isn't all that frum/full of torah either. Any chance that a year in Israel will convince her to go elsewhere?
Devorah: From what I've heard about College Park from living here in Silver Spring the last few months, it's probably not the best place for her, either. Friends of mine from high school went there thinking that since it has a huge Jewish community there'd be no problem maintaining and growing in their Yiddishkeit. Except that while there is a huge Jewish community in College Park, I'm told that most of them end up losing parts of their shmiras hamitzvos rather than enhancing it.
Michael -
Colleg Park is no haven, but is has better potential than GW and isn't all that far. Second of all there's Chabad and JLI there, so she would have more resources.
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