How to Lose a Girl in Two Dates or Boys Are Stupid, Throw Rocks at Them
Ok, I probably shouldn't be writing this or posting it and I generally don't post on this topic for very good reasons, but I have been assured that this will be very funny one day in the future so I'm saving it here for posterity.
I present to you....
Eli7's top things boys should not talk about on dates 1-3 (adjust accordingly):
- Freud (just take a minute and remember what Freud talks exclusively about)
- girls they've dated before
- the fact that they spent high school chasing girls
- the fact that college students spend a lot of time doing, well, stuff you shouldn't mention on a date
- that fact that you don't understand how said college students don't have affairs when they grow up
- what they're looking for in a spouse (in specific detail)
- why the past girls they've dated are not what they're looking for in a spouse
- what marriage is all about in the fluffy, glazed-eye way
- taharat ha'mishpacha
posted by Eli7 @ 12:29 AM
16 comments
16 Comments:
Great post!
here are a few more I can think of....
How much they like their mom's cooking.
How they would like a girl to dress...to describe it in detail..
How much fun it is hanging out in a yeshiva dorm (no kidding)...
Those are a few I have heard from my sister.
::writes list on hand::
great post. maybe should forward it to anyone you plan on dating in the future ;)
Another "boys are stupid, throw rocks at them" tip:
My sister once went to Dougie's with a guy who took his new shirt off at the table (she had gone to the bathroom and came back to see him in an undershirt - no tzitzis!) because he didn't want to ruin it by staining it with rib sauce.
Also, don't take girls to dark secluded places like piers.
But definitely not past relationships...or mention your most recent relationship more than once (if at all).
Iy"H the next one will be THE ONE!
Michael, that tops (no pun intended) any of my dating stories (and believe me, I have plenty).
Eli7, to add to your list, don't pick up a girl on a 100 degree day in June in your sorry excuse for a car with no A/C and then spend the whole date talking about how you should have rented a car for the date.
Here's a tip for the ladies...if you're not feeling well, canclel the date! The guy isn't going to think less of you. It's a lot better to cancel then to show up drugged up like a zombie.
Yikes! Sorry you went through that....
Talking about past dates is ok if you're talking about crazy dating stories.
Girls should avoid talking about how girls in seminary sleep in the same bed sometimes. Guys can get the wrong idea.....
But some guys are just so clueless. On average girls are much better than guys in the dating thing.
"Talking about past dates is ok if you're talking about crazy dating stories."
Um...no. Maybe after a few dates, after you've already gotten to know each other. But on date #1? No.
And yeah, I get the impression that girls are much better than guys at this stuff, but there are limits to how much you can chalk up to gender.
Sitting in your undershirt on a date = beyond the limit.
Talking about taharas hamishpacha on a date = way, way beyond the limit.
Stx, maybe I'm one of the clueless guys, but I don't get why relating funny dating stories is off-limits. Don't give names or too much detail. What's the problem?
Nephtuli, it's simple: if you're both telling stories of prior relationships that means both you're not focusing on the new one at hand.
Michael,
I don't get that. Why not? The first few dates are about making small talk and it's fun to listen to crazy dating stories. Neither party is focusing on anything else, just making conversation, which is what the first few dates are about.
Yes, Michael, you're right. Nephtuli, I don't know - maybe some girls don't feel like this, but I've heard many who do. It's not fun to sit there and hear a guy talk about how "Yeah, I was here with a girl a while ago, and you'll never guess what she did, it was so embarassing..." To the girl, this means a couple of different things: 1)I'm just one of a slew of girls and he stills remembers all the others so clearly, and 2)So am I going to be his hysterical story he tells on his next date with another girl?
Maybe that's illogical, maybe it's logical. But either way, those are the thoughts that will (probably) flit through a girl's head if you bring up funny dating stories like that. Really, talk about your cute little nephew. Talk about the time you embarassed yourself. Talk about a show you saw. But other dates? From what I've seen, not the best idea...
Just wanted to post my agreement with Stx-from experience...all you can think about is other other girls you've dated? Don't you have anything better to talk about? (Then again, in my case, it wasn't necessarilly funny stories...just random facts and then: "are you like that?")
Incidentally, check this out:
http://avatars.jurko.net/uploads/avatar_1588.jpg
A lot of common sense here, but
"what they're looking for in a spouse"
huh?
Surely that is the main point of shidduch dating. You are not there just for a good time, but with an ultimate goal.
Small talk of funny dating stories may help ease the tension that is often there. I guess it depends on what it was about / who was involved, but never talk about the girl/guy you dated (even without a name).
I can't understand anyone going out to eat taking off their shirt - even not on a date.
But I have in the past said stuff I know the girl wouldnt like, because I knew she wasnt for me.
I saw it in the pretzel store in Queens! Your quote! In the bathroom there's a picture hanging that has a drawing of a little boy running from rocks being thrown at him - the caption?
"Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them!"
So I thought of you and smiled.
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