Saturday, December 16, 2006

Parental Approval or Lack Thereof, Part II

I tend not to care very much what my parents think of my life choices. Or at least I pretend not to care. Maybe it's a defense mechanism for all the times I've made--and will continue to make--decisions my parents aren't particularly fond of. But as soon as something good happens I'm much more likely to call a friend than my parents. In fact, some of my friends' parents knew my last piece of good news before my parents did. It's not that my parents don't care so much as they have other things to worry about and they know that I'll be just fine at the end of the day either way.

But the fact that we have this mutual indifference--feigned or real--means that I have a lot more leeway in my decisions. I can make my choices without worrying what they'll say. And my parents almost never call me to nag. But then again, they almost never call. They have very little clue of what's going on in my life.

And I wonder what is better. Because though they're less likely to nag me and make me really stressed out, they're also less likely to celebrate with me when something really good happens. And no matter how much I pretend not to care and make my decisions without their input, maybe I still do want my parents' approval--nagging phone calls, overprotective annoyances, and all else it comes with. Maybe.


At 12/16/06, 5:51 PM, Blogger Deborah said...

Every time my Mom gives me a hard time about something, her response is always "You should be happy you have me to nag you!" And I actually called my mother o ask if she'd be upset if I didn't try out for law review. It's true, I prefer the over-involvement do a lack of interest. And you should know, my parents now brag that I have a friend that got a job (yes when bragging we say "job" not "internship") at ___ . ;-)

At 12/19/06, 2:32 PM, Blogger Scraps said...

There's definitely what to be said for overinvolvement vs. underinvolvement. Overinvolvement may be (and often is) annoying, but at least you know they care...


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