An Open Letter to My Roommates (Who Don't Read This Blog)

Dear Roommates,

Please do not use the new dishtowels I bought to mop the floor.

Also, please do not leave the front door wide open every time you come in to the apartment, especially when you go to a different room.

Please do wash your dishes. When you use them, not three days later. And while I might understand if you fell asleep after a long night of studying and left the dirty dishes from your last meal (even if I don't like it), if the dairy and meat sinks are both full of dishes, well, that's more than one meal.

Also, if you are tasked with delivering the rent check, please do not leave it outside on top of all the mailboxes.

Please close some of the kitchen cabinets some of the time. The "Did you grow up on a subway, where the doors close by themselves?" tack, seems like not the best option, especially for people who did not grow up in New York, but it doesn't take too much effort and prevents banged heads.

Please, please turn out the lights you are not using. If every time I walk into the kitchen, the lights are on and no one is there, we are both destroying the planet and running up our electric bill.

Please remove your old mattress that you are using as a couch in the living room. It is not a substitute for a couch, which we desperately need, and certainly doesn't make the apartment more home-like.

You reserve the right to ask me to be quieter when I am on the phone and you are studying in a different room. But you then lose the right to come into the room in which I am studying and have your own phone conversation.

And have a nice day.

Love, Eli7